I had forgotten what an emotional journey this would be for me. I had forgotten how hard it could be at the worst of times. It’s amazing how just gaining some perspective on things really gives you a jolt back to reality. When I began to make changes in my lifestyle I motivated myself by watching other people’s stories. I wanted to be one of those people too. I wanted to be successful and happy. I wanted to face my demons and rid them from my mind. I wanted, over all, to be free.
There is nothing in this world that makes me feel more free than exercise. I know! I am crazy that way. I missed being outdoors and moving my body. Late last night before I went to bed I watched a weight loss story on youtube. It was so inspirational. So emotional and so brilliant. It took so much courage and perseverance. I admire that so much! I saw this poor man running, huffing, puffing, falling down and then getting right back up. Through the tears and pain he got right back up and kept on fighting for his life. I thought to myself, why aren’t you doing that anymore? Well it was past midnight so it would of been a bit odd for me to go jogging so late at night..lol So instead, this morning I went for my fitness walk. I got back into it, enjoyed the sunshine and fresh air and once again felt free.
I weighed myself this morning too. Sadly I gained a few kilos back. I went back up to 95.8kg. I know..not the end of the world and I know I can lose it again. However, I didn’t meet my goal. I seem to have done it backwards..lol I am a pro at gaining weight! All I have to do is look at a cookie and I manage to gain a kilo..:) I don’t think I will make weight loss goals anymore. Short term goals or long term goals. It only stresses me out. Why stress myself out? I need to just let this happen naturally. This isn’t a race. I need to let my body do it’s thing. Take it one day at a time and allow it to change for as long as it needs to. My mind hasn’t even caught up with my weight loss so far and that is my worry. I need both to be in the same place. I think the only place I will challenge myself in will be exercise. That sounds a lot more fun than hopping on the scale! lol
I got this hiking trails book a couple weeks ago. I was thinking this could be a great challenge for me. It has 50 hiking tours and 3 levels of difficulty. A lot more easy ones actually but it’s still good. It just means the hard ones would count even that much more!
I love that it has a little map for every trail with written directions as well. It is water proof and supposedly the pages are rip proof too. So it’s very sturdy. I haven’t put the ripping to the test though as I don’t want to ruin it! So my challenge is to complete these 50 tours. I am not sure on putting a time frame on it yet. With Fall coming and then Winter I’m not sure how feasible it will be to reach some of the locations if the weather gets bad. So I don’t want to give a set time line. Perhaps it is safe to say I will try to complete at least 5 tours per month.
In order to get back into proper eating I will do a few days of meal replacement shakes. I just can’t seem to get a foot hold on over eating and food and I need a little time apart.
That’s all for Monday..hope you are all having a great start to your week 
